The Unfortunate Expert
As a wife who has lost her husband to suicide in 2006, I would like to address the recent celebrity suicides (Kate Spade & Anthony Bourdain). They were both well liked, sociable and in the public eye.
I am writing from my own personal experience, I am not writing on behalf of all wives or family members who has lost a loved on by suicide.
Kate Spade was a mother and a wife. Although, she and her husband were living separately, technically they were still married. As a wife, who was also separated from my husband when he died by suicide, I understand the emotional pain this death has brought to the family. Some people will assume, Kate Spade has taken her life because of her seperation to her husband, while others will accept, depression has gotten the best of her. But few people will be concerned about her daughter, husband and family members who are grieving the loss of their beloved Kate.
Anthony Bourdain was married twice and he has a daughter. Although, he was divorced, his ex-wives are still affected by his suicide. His daughter was born in 2007, she will be forever changed from the death of her father. Anthony Bourdain was also loved by so many. We allowed him into our homes by watching him on No Reservations and Parts Unknown. Anthony Bourdain was very opinionated, sarcastic and you either loved him or not. He will definitely be missed by many people who did not know him personally, but knew him for his love for food.
My question is....
When will we be concerned with the living? When will we care about those, who now will need to live in a world, where people want to know the details of how their mother or father died by suicide? Let's be more sensitive with our words, let's be more concerned with the people they left behind. Let's help those who are alive and are choosing to live everyday!
Maybe, you are wondering how can you make a difference? I'm glad you asked. Here are some ways you can make a difference in someone's life...
1. Reach Out! If you have been thinking about a friend or family member lately, call or contact that person and ask, "How are they doing?"
2. Listen! Did you know, a person who is struggling with suicidal thoughts, will give you little clues. The clues could be in a joking tone. Don't disregard it as, he/she was only joking or kidding.
3. Ask! Never be afraid to ask a person the straightforward question, "Are you having suicidal thoughts", If their answer is YES. Then ask, "Do you have a plan?"
4. Seek Professional Help! If their answer is Yes to your questions, call for help! Call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline 1-800-273-8255. If a person is in dire need, call 911.
5. Pray! Pray for for the person who is struggling with suicidal thoughts. Pray for peace and healing. Send out a Prayer Request to a Prayer Team, who values confidentiality and people. (Psalm 55: 16-17)
6. Follow Up! Keep in touch with the person. Build healthy relationship and enjoy life!